Invisible Wall

Okay so here I am writing something else when I should be focused on writing my novel more. I swear I want to beat myself up for procrastinating.

The thing is, I'm having Kyle issues at the moment and I'm not sure if my choices for his character's actions would cause my readers to hate him. I don't want them to hate Kyle! But anyway, I was actually at that part of my chapter when I just stopped writing and told myself, I'm not really sure if I should be going in this direction. After that I turned my computer off and did the only thing I could. I daydreamed and wrote notes and played with the idea in my head.

Everything was okay, I was able to handle the obstacles it's just that...I can't write it. It's stupid actually. How can I not write something I can write?The information is there, everything has fallen into place, but for the past week all I've done was just re-read the chapter and just stare at the blank space at the end of the page. I can't do it and I can't figure out why I'm so afraid to touch the subject. And with that in mind, I feel like the world of The Hunger is getting smaller by the day.

Is being a writer really healthy? I mean, being able to finish a chapter is really rewarding. It makes me feel good about myself but once I get to the point where I can't really write anything, I feel like I've bestowed upon myself this huge problem that wasn't even supposed to exist if I had decided not to write in the first place. The whole idea of wanting to write something, but not wanting to write it had put this heavy weight on my shoulders that every time I would sit in front of the computer this weight would become heavier and my mind would be blocked by an invisible wall, hindering me from continuing to the next paragraph of the story.

Is there like a degree of writer's block? Some writers actually seek therapy to cure this appropriate term for laziness that I was considering of doing the same. But alas, living in this country limits any benefits a normal person should have. So the only thing left for me to think of is how to break the invisible wall and just get the writing over with.