Me Against the World

I have a lot on my mind lately. I think I'm losing my ability to think like an individual. Everyday is a struggle, as I slowly feel myself becoming like every one else. I've morphed into someone I hardly recognize.

I always see myself as a happy person, and I don't care much about things. But lately everything is so darn serious. I feel the weight of the world against me, and it's forcing me to think about things that don't usually cross my mind. It might not be a big deal to some people, and I agree, but whenever I think about it I feel like a have this huge problem.

I think it's safe to say it's not puberty, I'm done with that a long time ago. I'd like to believe that it's a phase that everyone has to go through at a certain point of their life. But what bothers me is that I'm too young to be worrying about anything at all. I blame poverty.

Yes, I'm thinking about money. I have no dream of becoming rich, it requires too much hard work. But as of now, it's been bothering me. Dreams are not really free after all.

I'm also thinking about death. Lately, everyone seems to be dying. It's heavy to take in, real heavy. I'm talking about those famous people that had passed away this year, and of course my pets. I'm not really good at keeping my pets alive. Maybe it's just bad luck on my part.

I have this burden that's easy to get rid off but sticks to you like a leech. I feel like I'm aging faster because of it. I'm stressed and depressed. I have my needs fulfilled but not my wants. I'm thinking that these repressed desires will bite me on the ass one day and I'd just lose my mind completely.

Well as they say tomorrow's another day, and life goes on. I hate these cliches. They seem limiting, like we have no choice. But it's true, as much as I hate to admit. These burdens will pass, it's just a matter of how long I can hold on. But right now all I can do is to be brave. Life isn't without struggles. This is just one of them. There will be more to come.